Q:I’m pretty sure my girlfriend is sleeping around. The thing of it is, I think it is with another girl. I checked her cell phone the other night and she had some really racy and sexual texts between her and a girl named Stacey. I don’t know whether to feel turned on, or cheated on? Any thoughts on how to approach the subject with her and if I find out she did what to do next?
Triangle Man- Miami
Zach’s Wisdom, Response and Jealousy
Sir- You just potentially made every male reader of this column jealous. I salute you, I salute your girlfriend and if you break up with her please feel free to let her know my email address.
I’m pretty liberal in regards to bisexuality in women. My mindset would be if a girl in my life needs to spice things up (which is doubtful) I can deal with that far better than if she was with another guy. I understand this is not the case with everybody and it’s a topic that is very subjective.
First things first, no matter what you suspect it’s not cool to look through someone’s phone so don’t do it again. Suspicions or not, it’s an invasion of privacy . 2) Before you go assuming anything give her the benefit of the doubt, they were just texts and she could just be expressing herself and her sexuality in a harmless way. 3) You already committed the crime, fess up to looking at her phone and apologize, but also bring up what you saw. Don’t be mean or aggressive about it just ask her what she was up to in a non-threatening way. 4) Depending on her answer find out if it’s something that turns you on or not. Maybe it is and maybe it’s something you guys could look into as a way to spice up your sex life. Who knows, but it’s worth a shot. 5) If it is something you feel betrayed by- Well once trust is gone it’s hard to get it back in a relationship, so maybe it’s time to move on. Typically in instances of betrayal I’d say to move on first thing, but it sounds like you might be confused and I don’t have enough information to make that call for you.
If you do decide to move on and break it off with her, shoot for that threesome first- Who knows when that opportunity will come around again.
